T-Rex's Bizarre Adventure is the second episode of The Mentally Insane Adventures of T-Rex.
Plot[]
T-Rex was actually having a normal day for once. Normal by our standards...almost. No Kaiju had attacked, no Death Gods had been summoned, no alien invasions were taking place, and only a few wormholes had opened up. T-Rex was just walking around with Lady T-Rex. He looked around, and the sky was sunny, the birds were singing, it was...nice. "It's almost too good to be true" T-Rex said to himself. "Something wrong honey?" asked Lady T-Rex. "Nothing it's just....you feel like today has gone almost too well? Like seriously, nothing weird has happened! Jr is loving his new school, we've been enjoying this walk, Ankylo is auditioning for Jurassic World 2, heck we've been able to hold this conversation without a portal to hell opening up!" "Well maybe things are just going well, this could be a sign that life is getting better for us." said Lady T-Rex. "Thanks, but...well I lost any hope of that shit happening a long time ago. I'm so used to the insanity of my own life now that normalcy is just...weird. I swear this is going to turn to be a dream, or maybe I'm in another dimension. Y'know that kind of thing." "Oh don't worry it'll be fine. I'm...pretty sure we're not in another dimension. I hope. Still, you really shouldn't worry too much." replied Lady T-Rex. "Yeah, maybe you're right" said T-Rex. The two looked each other in the eyes, and then closed in for a kiss. Until all of a sudden T-Rex was knocked over and Lady T-Rex ended up almost kissing someone else entirely before she opened her eyes. "You cockblock!" yelled T-Rex, to this strange Kaiju. "Godammit I knew it. Right when I thought today might go right for me, nope, you had to show up. Well fuck you asshole, who the hell do you think you are-" before T-Rex could finish his sentence the Kaiju turned around and he saw who it was. "You thought I was just some asshole, but it was I, Dio!" The Kaiju exclaimed. T-Rex's mouth hung open. He was in shock to see Diosaurus standing before him. T-Rex's eyes narrowed. "You...." said T-Rex. "Yes, it is I, Dio!" Diosaurus repeated. "Yeah I heard you the first time asshole." said T-Rex. "And I know who you are. I remember you from when we were younger....so why are you here. Y'know, besides to get your ass kicked for making moves on my wife. " "Ah, I see you two finally tied the knot. Good for you T-Rex" replied Diosaurus. "No seriously...why are you here...and why did you talk you weren't complete asshole for about one sentence." T-Rex continued. "Well to be honest, my anime career didn't really take off like I thought it would, so I thought I'd come back to Monster Island to see what was going on back home....I found a giant crater in it's place so the island next door looked like it'd become it's replacement, so here I am". "Yeah that's a long story..." said T-Rex. "I see..." said Diosaurus. "Well it appears I'm too late to contest you for the hand of Lady T-Rex over here..." "Oh you've been too late." T-Rex interuppted. "Even still! I will kill you for uh.....dishonoring my family name! Yeah, that's it!". "What?" "OK FINE. YOU GAVE MY ANIME A BAD REVIEW ON YELP OK. NOW YOU'RE GONNA DIE." "Classic Dio.." T-Rex said dryly, having had to deal with Diosaurus since he was younger. Diosaurus got even more pissed off, and went to attack T-Rex, charging at him. T-Rex dodged this easily and hit Dio with his tail, knocking him over. Dio quickly got up, even more pissed, and soon the two got into a big and dramatic fist fight. Somehow...despite T-Rex being a T-Rex...uhh anyways the fight continued with neither Kaiju being able to best the other.
The fight continued, T-Rex and Diosaurus remaining evenly matched. This was until Giant Ankylosaurus and Barundabagungasaurus jumped out of the bushes and attacked Diosaurus, tackling him and causing him to tumble down the sidewalk. "Who dares to strike I, Dio!" He yelled. "Uh...us." said Ankylo. "YEAH NOW GET DA FUK OUTTA HERE BOI BEFORE I KEEL YO ASS" said Barunda. "Never!" yelled Diosaurus. He ran to attack until Rodan Jr swooped in and grabbed Diosaurus, lifting him up into the air before dropping him miles away. Rodan Jr then flew back down over to the others. "That should take care of him for a while" he said. "You guys alright" said Ankylo. "Yeah....." said T-Rex, his voice trailing off. "Something wrong?" asked Ankylo. "Yes actually. Why the fuck were you guys hiding in the bushes". "Uhhh...no reason...." replied Ankylo, with uneasiness clearly in his voice. "BECAUZE ANKYLO IS OVER PROTECTIVE AS FUCK BOOI!" said Barunda. "Yeah sure...that.." Ankylo said. "K" replied T-Rex. "So what was his deal anyway?" asked Rodan Jr. "Did you make another new enemy?" "No....he's an older one...." said T-Rex, still a bit off from seeing Diosaurus after so many years. "What happened bro?" asked Barunda. "Yeah....I'd like to know what this guy's deal is to" said Lady T-Rex. "Uggghh fine alright alright. i guess I have to add Jojo to the list of things I'm a parody of now but whatever, I'll explain it." "Ok" said Rodan Jr. "It was a dark and stormy night....." T-Rex began. "BOI" said Barunda. "What? It really was!" said T-Rex. "Well anyway...."
DISCLAIMER: THIS PORTION OF THE EPISODE WILL BE IN FIRST PERSON FROM T-REX'S POV. PLEASE EXCUSE THE SOMEWHAT SUDDEN PERSPECTIVE CHANGE
So it all started years ago, when I was a little mitt and so was he. We were riding in one of those carriages fancy people have because my dad had gotten rich off his acting career. So we were moving along until some asshole nuked our carriage and it fell off the side for the road. That guy probably buys nukes from North Korea. Remember kids, never buy shitty Korean knockoff nukes. Well anyway, what was left of our carriage fell near Diosaurus and his dad. Diosaurus's dad, I forget what his name was, probably not important, thought he would get some kind of reward or some shit If he saved us because this was the 1800s or something. I don't fuckin know, I just remember it was old times and shit. Anyways dad thought he was eternally in their debt because they save his life or something. Yeah that carriage must have had a universe-destroying bomb in it or something. So anyways they moved in with us and stayed with us for a while. Diosaurus was like the dickish, stubborn, competitive brother and rival I never had. Certainly better than Rick. Yeah Dio was kind of a dick, but he was cool sometimes. So we were practicing sword fighting or some shit and eyeing cute girls when I noticed something else about Dio. He really wanted to be better than me at stuff. I was never good at swordfighting, tiny arms and all that. So Dio kicked my ass and started gloating and shit. All makings of a good anime villain. It's a wonder his show didn't do well, probably some plot stuff. So as I was getting back up and telling Dio something like "Yeah you did good dude" when my dad was all like "Tyrannosaurus Dash Rex! Come here please". "Be right there dad!" I replied. So I went over to my dad and he was all like. "It's Dio's father.....he's dead." "Holy shit what happened!" I asked. "I don't know, that piece of shit doctor won't tell me" dad replied. "Maybe he died because he was old as fuck, hell if I know. Just, don't tell Dio ok. " "Why though?" I asked. "Because it will create a sense of drama even though we're going to cut to him having overheard our entire conversation" dad replied.
And indeed, Diosaurus had overheard the whole thing. So he was mad or something and swore revenge on our whole family or something like that. So this one time I was dating this cute girl (remember this was before I met Lady T-Rex) but then Diosaurus pushed her or something and attacked me for some reason. He tried to kill me but I kicked his ass so he got all pissy then left.
"T-Rex you're a shitty storyteller" said Barunda, interrupting T-Rex.
"Dude! I'm talking here! STFU."
"Yeah dude let him finish" said Ankylo.
"That's what she said" said Barunda, before he was promptly slapped by Lady T-Rex.
"So can I finish the story?" said T-Rex
"Sure sure whatever" replied Barunda.
So anyways I thought Dio attacking me was weird af because I didn't know he wanted some poorly explained revenge on us at the time. I went to tell bad but he said Dio was just grieving, so I let it slide. I'd still kick his ass if he tried again though. So I tired being nice to him but he did that thing edgy anime characters do where they pretend to hate everything and act all dickish to people. Or that guy who's too cool to be friends with anyone. You know what I'm talking about right?
"Being a Shinji?" said Rodan Jr.
"Sure close enough" said T-Rex.
T-Rex continued:
So I was nice to Dio for a while but a few years later my dad died. That fucking sucked. This was when I began my quest to destroy Five Nights at Freddy's by the way, since Purple Man killed him for some stupid reason. Then some asshole called MatPat claimed that Purple Man was super important to my secret lore he totally figured out, so I killed his ass to. So anyways I came home from the funeral and I was feeling really depressed. Rick was still edgier somehow...that was weird. So I came home and found Dio sitting in my dad's old chair. "Hello T-Rex." he said. "I'm sorry to hear about your father....." after saying that he smiled, so I knew something was up. "What did you do!" I yelled. "Nothing, I just persuaded the Purple Man into taking care of your father for me...his skeleton looks great in that museum by the way. Just how he wanted it right?" Dio said, clearly mocking me because he's an asshole. So if you couldn't guess, I was PISSED. "I'LL FUCKING KILL YOU!" I yelled. I lunged at Dio but he tail whipped me away. Somehow Dio learned some dark magic or some shit so he started levitating. I'll admit, he looked kind of cool. So we started fighting and it was pretty awesome, but the fight was also long as fuck so I'll be skipping over it. So after the mansion burned down (yeah that happened to) Dio disappeared. Then I went on some quest thing for a while, met some cool people, and fought Jack The Ripper. Also Dio became a vampire or something but he seems fine now so I have no idea what the fuck is going on. Also he killed my friend Danny DeVito.
"And that's why Dio is trying to kill me" T-Rex said, finishing his story.
"10/10 IGN would listen to again" said Barunda. "So what do we do now?" asked Lady T-Rex. "I dunno" replied T-Rex. "SUCH GRIPPING DIALOGUE" interrupted Barunda. "lel" said Ankylo.
And then Diosaurus leaped out to attack T-Rex.
TO BE CONTINUED.
*Jojo music plays*
"Really? You're really pulling that? Dude that meme is so dead!" said T-Rex.
What? I had to get this episode out somehow!
"Riiiiiggghhhttt. Because two episodes of this series being written before you leave it on the backburner is sooo much better than just having one." replied T-Rex
Hey! I worked hard to write this episode!
"You haven't even seen Jojo!" said T-Rex
Well yeah but....
"Just finish the damn episode!" T-Rex demanded.
Fine! Jeez.
Dinosaurus lept out but T-Rex managed to tail whip him to the ground. Diosaurus quickly got back on his feet and soon ran in to attack T-Rex, who did the same. The two both ran at each other and it was super epic....only for them to then commence a slap fight. This continued until All of a sudden Diosaurus was blasted away by a blue beam of energy, which caused a huge explosion.
"Am I late?" asked Godzilla.
The End.
There, better?
"Meh, it was an alright ending." replied T-Rex.
Oh screw off!
Characters Featured[]
- T-Rex
- Lady T-Rex
- Diosaurus
- Giant Ankylosaurus
- Barundabagungasaurus
- Rodan Jr
- Godzilla
- Dio's dad (Flashback)
- Purple Man (Flashback)
- Danny DeVito (Flashback)
- Grandpa Rex (Flashback)
- T-Rex Jr (Mentioned)
- The Author
Trivia[]
- The title of this episode was also considered as the title of the series itself.
- This episode is an obvious parody of Jojo's Bizarre Adventure, an anime I have technically never actually seen....so I hope this goes well.
- This is the first time T-Rex's friends make full appearances in the series, as the first episode focuses mainly on T-Rex's family.
- This episode confirms that the series takes place after the events of T-Rex: Final Final Wars: Giant Clusterf*** All Out Attack!, as is stated on the series page.
- This episode revels that T-Rex's full name is "Tyrannosaurus Dash Rex".
- This episode is the first time another user's Kaiju, here being Barundabagungasaurus, appears in the series
- This episode completely and utterly destroys the fourth wall by T-Rex having a direct conversation with me, the author.